Posts tagged Star
Fallen
1Am I fallen, or am I falling?
Am I forsaken, or am I forsaking?
Am I unique, or am I losing it?
I ask you, all of this.
And what do I get?
Nothing, nothing but silence.
Why am I here?
Why did you make me like this?
Is it for a cause?
Is it for a purpose?
Why give me this, and not give me the instructions.
Why make me like this, but not make it easy.
Would that make it too easy?
Would that make it too open?
If so, than what am I supposed to do?
Sit here alone?
Go out a fight?
Help the wounded?
Or just keep on asking why?
Oh, why, why?
Why would you leave me here?
Oh, why, why?
Why wont you answer me here?
Oh, why, why?
Why wont you tell me?
Oh, why, why?
Why do you keep trying to break me?
All I want, all I ask, is a little help
But all I get, all I hear, is a little hurt.
Why? Why make it like this?
Are you this cruel?
Or is there a point?
Can’t you just nod, or make some sign?
Oh, why, why?
Why wont you answer me?
Oh, why, why?
Why wont you comfort me?
Oh, why, why?
Why would you give me this?
Oh, why, why?
What can I do with it?
But sit here alone, staring up at you.
Asking you these worthless questions.
I guess I’ll never know, but it was worth a try.
Until the next I cry, This is goodbye.
Rue, baby, Rue.
1Hello. 
So, today was okay…slept in till 11:30l 11:30
English: World English Bible - WEB
30 For even as Jonah became a sign to the Ninevites, so will also the Son of Man be to this generation.
WP-Bible pluginam, and stayed in bed till 12:30l 12:30
English: World English Bible - WEB
30 For the nations of the world seek after all of these things, but your Father knows that you need these things.
WP-Bible pluginpm lol…
This was because I was on the phone with Madison though 
...anyway....did this for a good bit, then I was up just walking around and playing with meh demon cat 
and then talked to momma for a spell...then we ended up going to McDonald's for a drink, and ended up getting burgers 
Then a bit later after I ate I jumped into the shower, then got on the PC for a bit while my hair dried haha...then Mom got ready, and so did I...because we decided since she had the day off, and I still am looking for a job, why not go to gainesville outlet mall, and get some apps :] So right before we headed out Dad got home, and he joined us
When we got there I went to Rue21 and got a app, then filled it out and came back :]
And they seemed to like me…so maybe I have a job? I’m praying so :] and for backup I also got a app at Gap and Reebok at the same mall :]
So today was eventful and meaningful…but man, when I got home I started getting sinus pressure and migraines kicked in 
So I laid down and ended up missing supper because of it…I was in too much pain to move, let alone eat hah…especially since Dad keeps the TV ungodly loud 
But thankfully after the nap and a quick bowl of cereal, the migraine was down to a headache, and the sinus pressure was almost gone :]
So I called Madison, and right away she made me take a Tylenol haha…
Then at about 9pm I guess it was Madison left to call some other people before it got late, and I ate something else and sat down and watched All About Steve with Josh and Aaryn :]
But then around 11:30pm Madison finally called me back…and I was on the phone with her up till around 12:15am when she went to bed :] And all I have done since then is checked my email, uploaded some new smileys and done this blog haha.
And this, ladies and gentlemen, has been my day
Until we meet again in this lonely abyss we call the “internet”,
So long, my wonderful readers.
U2 WAS AMAZING! :] Oh, And The Rest of My Week.
3So, I haven’t blogged in awhile…sorry 
Well, so…
Saturday: Did some last minute packing for Oklahoma trip…ate, talked on the phone some…then around 5pm we headed out…many songs and silliness-ness later…we arrived in Ada, OK where my sister Amber lives at about 7:30pm’ish?
We unpacked the musical gear from the truck…then headed to Blue Moon Cafe…which, is where this was taken of Jessie
Then we headed to the church to practice…Josh, Jessie, Amber, Michael (her husband), and I played for my sister’s church on sunday morning ;]
After about 2hrs we were done learning about 6 songs…most of which were new to Amber and Michael…and 1 was new to us all except Josh, who wrote it…and writes most of what we play…we being The Joshua Band aka. Josh, Jessie, Chris(who couldn’t come) and I…
And jeez…my hands we’re literally about to bleed and we’re blistered…and ripped in 3 places…because they have their drums in a box thing…so you have to beat the heck out of them to get dynamics
After that we headed to Michael’s dad Mickey’s house, and unpacked…that is where we slept
And I talked to my Madison till about 4:30am that night…long story…..and to you Madison…thank you, and I believe and accept it now…hopefully over time I’ll learn to trust in it more and make use to it like you have my love….
Sunday: Woke up about 9am…got ready, and headed to Life Community Church to play :]
After church, we headed to Rib Crib (delllicious :]), and this is where I took a pic of my hands seen here…this picture doesnt do them justice to how bad it was sadly
after that we went back to Pastor Mickey’s house and changed…then around 4pm we headed over to Amber’s house…then at around 4:30pm we headed out to Norman, OK….To see U2
got there, got inside, found our seats…and at around 7pm Black Eyed Peas started…They were good…but dude with the mo-hawk cannot sing worth a crap live…but My Humps, Boom Boom Pow, I Gotta Feeling, and Big Girls Don’t Cry was still awesome live though :] Will-i-am and Fergie are still awesome sounding live :]
Then at around 8:45pm U2 started :] EEE!:D…..and LORD GOD JESUS…I had a Concertgasm Like seriously…it’s gonna be hard to enjoy any other concert now…I mean think about it…I’ve seen the best one in every way…so now everything else will fall short in all but prob one or two areas hah. Vids here. Pics here or here
Then after the amazing show (we got out at about 12:20am) we drove home…got home around 2am because of the crazy traffic…and headed to bed.
Monday: didn’t wake up till around 1pm haha…then we woke up, went to Amber’s house for a bit….went and ate at Braum’s…then went back to the church loaded up our gear, then went to Amber’s house again…and chilled there till around 3:20pm when we headed out…
Got home at around 5:20pm…then I talked on the phone till around 1am. and went to bed.
Tuesday: What did I do tuesday? not alot haha…Talked on the phone, worked on random Gfx, uploaded U2 videos and pictures…and oh, stayed up till 5am fixing the church’s pc…I fixed it at around 10pm…it was a bad PSU…and I happened to have a spare one from eariler…and fixed it…then I got anything off of it we could use (Dad bought it from another church that was shutting down, and selling off their stuff for $100)…
Then reformatted it, and installed a fresh new install of Windows XP – Vortex 3G RED Edition, then loaded it with software we need like MediaShout, WinDVD, K-Lite Codec Pack…etc and other software you need really like Auslogics BoostSpeed, CCleaner, Filezilla…etc
After doing all that, upgrades, fixing random stuff like missing audio and ethernet drivers, and cleaning off un-needed hardware…it was around 5am
Wednesday: Today? not alot…talked on the phone with Madison alot, done homework, messed with stuff on the pc, talked on the phone some more…chatted with some old friends I haven’t in a long while on Facebook (Hi Sparky! ), and then started this.
So that has been my weekend /week. :]
Little late…but it’s for a reason.
0Hello all, and sorry its so late…well for me making this anyway hah (currently 3:24am CST)
Well first off, went to classes, and they went well :] got to talk to some classmates, who are new friends I’m slowing making (hopefully) haha…
Had to sit in traffic for 1 1/2hrs though on the way home…there was a nasty 4 car wreck on Lake Lewisville bridge fun, no?
Then I got home, talked to my love, Madison (sorry, you’re still feeling sick dear ), and checked my email….and you know what I had in the inbox?
– time for infomercial!
It was a PayPal notification of payment from Pickydomains.com, whom I joined as a contributor recently, and within the first day I had someone pick one of my suggestions for a domain. :]
So check it out if you want! It’s legit, fast, and easy to make a quick buck ($25 per picked domain) if your creative making a domain name (and well after you check to make sure its not taken that is…I use GoDaddy.com domain search to do so) :]
– end infomercial
and yeah, rest of day was mostly spent on the phone with Madison….up until around 7pm when my sissy Amber, who lives in Oklahoma got here! :] Then we ate supper, watched Fringe(I it), and then around 10pm Madisono called me back…and that’s all I did…up till 12:10l 12:10
English: World English Bible - WEB
10 Everyone who speaks a word against the Son of Man will be forgiven, but those who blaspheme against the Holy Spirit will not be forgiven.
WP-Bible pluginam….that’s when we got a call from Sarah, my sis-in-law, that Brandon my oldest bro was sick, and couldn’t hold anything down, so he was constantly puking
So, we went over to their house to watch their kids, while she took him to the emergency room…and we did so, all of us, except Josh…and we was there up till about 2:40am…when they got back…apparently Brandon has Influenza…not Swine Flu…but still bad Influenza
Then we headed home, grabbed some hot chocolate and goodies at RaceTrac in Denton…then I got on here and started blogging :]
Fun day, eh?
Essay, Photoshop, and Missing Church.
3Hi there my readers! yes, I’m speaking to all 2 of you. hah.
My day was okay today, kinda bland again. I woke up at around 11:30pm from about 10 messages from Madison on IM that I had missed from 8am-11:20am IM SORRY BABY! :[ This keeps happening here lately and I'm sorry my love *kiss*
Anywho, got up, ate some grub, and then got on the computer. Where I did pretty much nothing of use, till Stephanie texting me, asking if I knew where to learn how to use Photoshop...So after a little while when I was on the pc, I sent her a list of sites for Tutorials, Inspiration, Brushes, and Fonts to help her out :] So that made me feel a little better that my time was actually helping someone maybe…
THEN…*cue theme music* DA DA DA!!!!! *drum roll*……….getting excited yet?…..*drum roll*……..*drum crash* MADISON CALLED! haha.
And I talked to her for a good bit o’ time, but she was tired and took a nap while keeping me on the line. So I got on Photoshop and Illustrator
Here’s what I made
Then, once Madison woke up, we talked some more, and she realized it was 6:50pm and I wasnt at church, and I told her about how my parents were still gone wherever, and so I didnt have a ride there, which also made me miss Cayli’s birthday party meh….anyway, then supper was done, and I let her go, ate, and then called her back.
But she had to do something, I forget what? And made me do my homework haha. So I finished up my Human A&P homework, and was in the middle of revising my “If” paper for English class when she called. And she helped me correct it and gave me alot of useful tips and ideas on what to do on the parts I was lost in.
So thanks so so much baby :] You’re a lifesaver *kiss* I lovea you! lol.
And then after I finished up that it was getting late, so I let my love go to bed, and I got up on the pc and starting typing this…man I was really detailed today eh?
Oh well!
EEK! I sorrys! :[
2I haven’t blogged in a few days…oops! well…HI!
So, recap needed of the weekend? Not really…but I will anyway!
Sunday:
Woke up at 9am, got ready, and went to church, had our pre-service practice at 9:30am, and church started at 10:30am…worship went well…Dad’s sermon this week was really good, but like it can be was a “toe-stomper” subject church let out and we headed to Luigi’s Pizza Italian Restaurant and ate some grub with my fam fam and Joseph Weaver and his fam :] I got Lasagna! mmm :] then we headed home, and from then on I was on the phone off and on with Madison. :]
Monday:
Hmm…well Monday was pretty bland, except getting to talk to my love after she was out of school :] Oh, I guess I could mention that Monday night I started messing around in Adobe Photoshop, Illustrator, and Dreamweaver CS4 again trying to refresh myself, and get back into the habit. I’m going to start making something in Photoshop (or Illustrator) daily…even if its useless and random, just to keep refreshed, and to get practice in! That, and I’m trying to figure out how to make WordPress themes
Oh! Oh! I got really bored in Photoshop too Monday night and made all of these!
Tuesday:
Also pretty bland…except for once again talking to my love off and on when she was out of school :] — and a side note to my love, sorry you had a bad day today *kiss* I hope I helped make it better in some way throughout the day *kiss kiss* I Love You, My Angel :]
and that pretty much sums it all up, because I talked on the phone to me Madisono! And I ate grilled chicken with my fam fam + Aaryn = all my fam fam soon enough anyways
So yeah, that’s been My weekend/Monday/Tuesday/Why do I keep/Everything I say?/No/Idea/Huh/That’s just/Odd./././.
Oh, and yeah. Haven’t done this in awhile…and I really should have
Please check out these few sites by simply clicking on the pictures, and if your heart calls and beacons you, like it did, and does mine, then please join these causes…
It would mean alot to me, to many unborn babies wanting to live, and also to confused and hurt teens/adults needing love.
Practice makes…decent?
2Well, my day started out late…I woke up at 12:30pm
Anyway, I pretty much chilled at home and talked to my Madison all day up till around 5:30pm when I showered, then left for my church, in Denton. When we(Dad, Mom, Hailey[niece], and I) got to the church, I talked to everyone who was there for awhile. Then Cody came to my church about 6:40pm, and we left to go to Grace Fellowship to practice a song he wrote…
Oh, btw I’m now basically part of 3 bands: My church’s worship team, The Joshua Band, and now Cody’s band which has yet to be named :]
Anyway, we got there and UGH…I had to use the electronic drums already there for this week…and Lord God Jesus…I forget how much they suck…mehh. But I managed to get through the practice decently, despite having no real dynamics (which caused me to blister my hands horribly because out of habit I play harder to sound louder.), but we got it basically down in the 1hr of practice we had…so that’s good I guess :]
OH! OH! OH! I almost forgot to say!…….Hi. :]
Time for the “Drew’s life” cram session.
1Okay, so…It’s been awhile, and there is too much to really cover…so I’ll break this down as much as I can…
First off lets hit the “Relationship” category…so, me and Hattie went downhill fast…she did things already in the past that I had forgave her for, stuff that I didn’t deserve to even happen to me honestly, but I still stayed with her and things we’re looking okay for awhile.
Then, Wham! Things for us starting declining, we started arguing more, especially in the area of her thinking and accusing me of being unfaithful (which will never happen in my book. If I don’t love you, I’ll leave you. Not cheat on you.) when in reality she was again, and I didn’t know.
Anyway, A few weeks before the Assembly of God camp thing I was going to with a AoG church in Denton I go to Sunday nights(when I can) and Wednesdays named Grace Fellowship, She broke up with me.
But she still tried to lead me along and leave me to believe she still loved me, despite the fact she was already all over other men.
And then Saturday day before camp I went with my brother Brandon to meet up with his ex-wife Angelique to drop off his daughter Hailey for the week, and I started talking to him about everything going on…everything…and everything I told him she was doing and saying, he remembered that’s just how his ex-wife would do and/or say.
And it was an eye-opener…I wasn’t sure if I should try to wait and see if she would change or get better, because I tend to be too nice and do that.
Then we got to the meeting point and I got out and talked to Angelique a little…and I realized something. He was right, Hattie was my version of a Angelique in my life. But I had an opportunity to end it before we we’re married and I end up married, then divorced to her, and save some pain. My brother unfortunately did not have a chance to do that.
Anyway, that Monday when we were leaving for camp. When I saw her, I let her go completely…and she didn’t let go of me, and that night I met two new friends: Nathan, and Madison.
And instantly I felt a connection with Madison I’d never felt before. I didn’t know what it was, but I didnt want it to leave.
Anyway, over that week, Hattie continued to argue and try to tell me she loved me.
And the more time I spent with Madison, the more I found how much of a fool I was to have ever considered my past relationships “Love”. Because with her, within that week I felt the same, and above the level of compassion and feelings towards her then I did with my exes. So by a few days in we decided to start dating, and this made Hattie furious that she just lost this game of leading me on even though she wasn’t ready to be committed to just me, or really love me.
But, and hopefully this doesn’t sound too cold…but I could care less about Hattie at that point.
All I cared about was listening to Madison talk, and learn more about her, and just take in her beauty inside, and out.
And even though it was an unorthodox way to meet your love, it happened regardless. :] Love you baby *kiss*
psst. this is her :]
Alright! well that’s basically out of the way…basically hah.
Next up is “Life”! haha. So yeah, now I’m a senior in high school (woot), I’m madly in love, I’m getting better at drums practically every month I almost feel like (I’m seriously not trying to be cocky, but yeah.), and OH. I have my driver’s license now! WOO! But, I have no car.
Oh, and later this next week dad is going to help me put in applications at a few places so I can gets a job!
So, as you can see. the biggest chunk of catching up was my whole “Relationship” story hah. there is other stuff I’m prob not thinking of…but I don’t remember at this time…if I do, I’ll just edit this or make a new entry :]
I Know…I Know…
0That was some hardcore procrastination going on there…wow…
I apologize.
Soon, not tonight as it is too late, I will get on here and get everyone up to date and start blogging again…the only reason I stopped was because I got behind and felt I had too much to cover now.
But oh well! I’ll just give a summary of it all and you can all deal with it haha!
Anyway, sorry for the long absence…I promise I’ll try to not make it happen again :]